Wednesday, August 31, 2011


God had different plans. I'm home in Arkansas with my stuff from the storage unit. Translation: There's clutter EVERYWHERE!

I hate clutter. I hate it more than anything. The pain of discovering that I wasn't going to return to NCU is still fresh, but I've made up my mind not to be depressed about it.

But I am more stressed than I ever have been. Now I have all this stuff to sort through, and knowing that it should be up in Minnesota and not here hurts. Not to mention clutter stresses me out!

God, help me to know Your will for my life, and to get this clutter sorted out! I need You now, more than ever!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Be thankful

Be thankful in all circumstances.

This is something that seems really hard to do right now.

Right now, I'm believing for God to provide for my schooling. If He has something else in mind, let's go with that, but I'm pretty sure He wants me back at NCU.

It's hard sometimes, a struggle of faith vs. fear. But I have to remind myself that He has a plan for me, a good one at that!

It's hard not to be jealous or resentful of my friends who have gotten full rides to their respective universities and don't have to worry about money. I studied and worked my tail off during high school and grabbed some scholarships--but it wasn't nearly enough. Not to mention I didn't get the ACT score I wanted.


But during our ice cream date tonight, my awesome dad reminded me that there is more to life than ACT scores, scholarships, plans, etc. He told me about some disappointments that he had during his twentysomething years, but he told me that God had worked it out later on. And when I say worked out I mean REALLY worked out! Sometimes we don't understand the whole situation because we can't see it from God's point of view. GOD is the One who charts our path, and He is the One who orders our steps.

Maybe it's time I got out of the way and let Him do that! :)

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Faith that Receives

I'm discovering the definition of faith everyday. By discover, I mean experience. You see, I believe that faith is what Hebrews 11:1 says it is: being SURE of what we hope for and CERTAIN of what we do not see.

Right now, I'm at the place where I should be panicking--financially. But if I know anything about God it's that He is faithful. He would not tell me to go back to NCU unless He had a plan for how we were going to pay for it.

It's a battle of faith vs. fear everyday, but I remind myself that God's Word is true; and God ALWAYS keeps His promises!

In December 2010 the Lord dealt with Brother Copeland to tell those involved with his ministry to "have faith in God and EVERYTHING is gonna be alright!" I have seen this word demonstrated in my own life already this year!

In February, NCU announced that Carlstrom Deaf Studies would have to be phased out due to low enrollment and finances. For those who do not know what Carlstrom Deaf Studies is, it's a pastoral training program for Deaf/Hard of Hearing students (Interpreting is in the Intercultural Studies department so Interpreting would not have been affected). Upon hearing the news, Deaf and Interpeting students alike immediately rushed to prayer for battle. Our student body joined in and agreed with us for God's provision and help. Dr. Gordon Anderson, the president of our University told us in a meeting with him that it would take an endowment for the program to continue--but we would need a million dollars to make that happen. :/. It sure looked impossible, but we believed that God was making a way for this program to stay open.

Two months later, Dr. Anderson sent an email out to all Deaf/Interpreting students and asked us all to be present in chapel on Monday. Not sure what to expect, I went and sat in the well known "Deaf section" on the right side of the stage.

Dr. Anderson's next words had all of us on our feet cheering in victory! Two women had anonymously donated 600,000 dollars and 400,000 respectively--enough to create an endowment to keep the program open. Glory be to our great God!

Nothing is impossible with him who believes!

So while I am believing for money for school, I will keep my eyes on Him and seek Him. He is my Source. Not my parents. Not a job. Not the government. And He can not lie.

And that's that!